Sunday, July 19, 2015

New Sight

New Sight

We eat of fruit
We do not like
And cast a spell
To lose our sight
Light in signs all around
But darkness is where we’re most found
Pitch forks and swords
Is what we hungry most for
We need help and we need Other
But yet we think the problem lies with our brother
Escapism isn’t what we lack
Being present & mindful
Not looking back
In the future is where we need to go.
You’ll catch up, don’t worry so
Unity is what we’re made for
Justice, Mercy and to Love more
More than just the ones like us
That real lesson in love is a must
To strive to learn what real love is
And there’s never one we could dismiss 
For love is blind
And requires us to be kind
Loud rules hidden in silence
Are far better than a foolish sense
For silence is golden and
Humility treasured
Many are proud
but few actually measure
The weight of their words
Forever marked on their hearts
Shows true fear
And a conscious seared
For real love perseveres
Through indifference and indoctrines
For hate always has an end
But love always endures without a bend.

Monday, July 6, 2015

My Favorite Song if You Put a Gun Up to My Head...

So a few weeks ago I went to a concert with my sis and her two friends.  While my sis and I were awkwardly sober pregnant chicks (and I say awkwardly sober because when experiencing Lana Del Ray concert, I'm now pretty convinced requires some form of alcohol to enjoy un-awkwardly, at 30 and fully clothed.)  But anyways, after the concert, we had to sit in the car for like 2 hours because the parking and traffic at Verizon are so awful I will not go back unless it is a band that I am absolutely obsessed with.

While we were sitting there, having deep discussions with my sister's funny, intoxicated friends.  The token gay guy of the group asked a question that had me thinking for a long time and I did not have a direct answer for at the moment:  "What is your favorite song?  If a person put a gun to your head and asked you that.  What would you say?"

I was stumped.  I couldn't think of one I particularly liked so much.  I was thinking of songs on the radio, the catchy ones, but they get old pretty quick.  Then I started on ones that had the most impact on me.  And one stuck out, it was Bethany Dillon's Revolutionaries.

I wish my pick was some really cool cultured deep song but it's actually quite a simple one written by a teenager.  I think she wrote it when she was like 15 or something.  I first heard of the song and her music when I was about 18.  I credit a lot of my independent spiritual wrestling/awakening to her music throughout the years.  Not only did she write songs about following all the rules but knowing there was something more.  She also made statements that she believed God was not angry or unjust but done nothing but has compassion on us.

These were really profound lyrics to a sheltered girl that loved God but was trapped in Dogmatic legalism.  My instinct told me there was something more and music reinstated that again and again in me.  When I think back to stepping out and searching even though I feared for my soul a lot of times, it took a lot of faith and sometimes that's all I had that convinced me I was not headed down a spiraling path of lies and deceit.

What is so intimate to myself about the song Revolutionaries is the way the song spoke to me each different season in my life at a new refreshing way.  It was always beckoning me to step further out and further in. While also questioning me to ask what I am following, why I am following it and to always remember that I have dreams even when others shoot them down and they seem foolish. They are not foolish, even when they've failed because I've always learned something from them.

A lot of times when I stepped out in faith in my life, I have felt alone and misunderstood.  Actually the first years of my 20's were a very confused, hurt and often feeling secluded by ones that nurtured me. They seemed scared for me. But I look back at those years and I thank God for them so much because without those hard times I wouldn't be half the person I am today and had to totally depend on God.  This song addresses that.  But it is also those times I have found out a little more just how strong-willed and independent and a little less fearful of obstacles and people's opinions that no longer matter.  I know what the still small voice in my head says and I follow that, and it has never lead me down a spiraling tunnel of hurt or brokeness but the opposite.  I have somehow found myself more and more in the long run and have found more Grace, Love and adventure than I had imagined and I'm not done putting my tracks on the dirt quite yet! So please, listen and enjoy this song and I hope it inspires others as it has inspired me throughout many years!